


Magic Tricks

by Amurtinyburr12



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Bat Family, Crack, Magic Tricks, crack kinda, gonna tag it as crack because i don't know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 20:57:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7284457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amurtinyburr12/pseuds/Amurtinyburr12
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tim pulls coins out of Damian's ear and turns Bruce into a rabbit.</p><p>Dick can use the force.</p><p>Jason lays on the couch.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Magic Tricks

**Author's Note:**

> I'm in the middle of writing for my other Bat-family story (if you haven't read that one I think you should) but this idea came to me about a half hour ago and I couldn't shake it. I watched Now You See Me 2- then I looked up magic tricks and thought about the Bat-family doing some of them.

Tim pulled the coin from behind Damian's ear once again and laughed when he saw how red the younger boys face was. "How many coins do you have back there Dami?"

Damian glowered. "I demand to know how you're doing this Drake."

"Easy," Jason grinned from his place on the couch. "He's an actual magician."

Tim nodded seriously. "I'm just beginning but someday I'll be able to turn you into a rabbit at the snap of my fingers."

Damian's eyes widened fractionally. "You can do that?"

Tim pulled a hat from behind his back and held it up for his audience. "I can. I've already turned Bruce into one- adults are easier to do than kids. He's here in this hat." He let the younger Robin peer into the hat.

"I don't see anything," was all the other boy said, voice skeptical.

Tim went back behind the counter he'd set up his "magic shop" in (much to Alfred's horror- it had taken a lot of convincing for him to let Tim use the kitchen as the stage for his show.) He set the hat down, the way someone would place it on their head.

Damian sat back down on the couch by Jason, watching intently.

"Bruce wasn't too fond of being turned into a bunny, he said he'd prefer to be a bat," Tim said conversationally, carefully flipping over the hat and waving his hands over it. Too bad he didn't have a wand- it would've been a nice touch.

Tim dramatically reached into the hat and produced a small white rabbit for Damian to hold.

"Father?" He whispered, lifting the rabbit to his face and studying it closely. "Turn him back!'

Jason chuckled, clearly amused by Tim's 'magic'. "He'll turn Bruce back later, I'm sure. For now, since he's so little I'd take care of him and make sure nothing hurts him."

Damian's face turned hard as he stared at the rabbit in his hands. "Nothing bad will befall you," He promised it fiercely.

"What's this?" A new voice entered the room. The three boys turned to see Dick, motorcycle helmet in hand, standing in the doorway.

"Tim's doing magic for Damian," Jason supplied lazily, reclining his head on Daminans leg and propping his feet on the armrest.

Dick's eyes lit up and he all but threw his helmet onto Jason before shoving Tim aside. "You want magic baby bats? In the circus sometimes we got bored and learned a few parlor tricks. They're good for picking up the ladies."

Jason snickered and tossed Dick's helmet onto the floor.

Tim couldn't find it in himself to be upset that his magic show had been interupted- whenever Dick mentioned his Haly Circus days it reduced him back into the awestruck fanboy he'd once been. (And if he was completely honest, he still was.)

Dick rushed to the kitchen and began tearing through drawers for a good minute until he aparentally found what he needed. When he returned, he held up the wire to a paperclip- but he'd straightened it out into a flat line. "See this wire?"

The boys nodded in confirmation.

"I'm going to use the force to bend it with my mind."

"What's the force?" Damian asked whilst stroking the top of Bruce's ears.

Jason's head popped up from the couch. "Shit Dami, we're gonna need to watch Star Wars later."

"It allows people to control things with their minds," Tim said helpfully.

Dick nodded then focused on his paperclip. He held it in one hand and with the other he spread his fingers out and concentrated. The paperclip slowly began to bend inwards on its own.

"The hell?" Jason's eyes narrowed. "Now I actually want to know how you did that."

Dick smiled contagiously. "A good magician doesn't reveal his secrets, you know that Jaybird."

"Another, Grayson." Damian ordered, still holding Bruce protectively to his chest. "Entertain."

Dick complied, retreating back to the kitchen and returning with a Styrofoam cup. "I'm gonna demonstrate once again how strong the force is with me by making this cup levitate."

Tim leaned forward, determined to figure out how this one was done.

Dick placed the cup between his fingers. "Sometimes this trick is a bit harder than others- especially since a cup is bigger than a paperclip. But..." He released his fingers and wiggled them a bit. The cup floated between his hands.

Damian's eyebrows knit together. It would be a miracle if a vein in his neck didn't pop from the way his body was tensing. "How?"

"Wait a minute." Tim stood up and lunged for Dick's hand.

"Tim!" Dick complained as Tim snatched the cup from him and turned it over.

"Obvious," Tim showed the hole that had been punctured in the back of the cup to Jason and Damian. "He put his thumb in this hole and moved it around to give the illusion of levitation."

Jason got to his feet, feigning anger. "Fraud!'

Damian stood as well, yelling something about impostors and liars.

Dick merely shrugged. Rabbit Bruce, apparently annoyed by all the noise took this moment to jump from Damian's arms and run from the room.

"FATHER!" Damian screeched in horror, racing after it in panic.

Tim watched him leave, another smile threatening to find its way to his lips.

Bruce appeared in the other doorway, face unreadable. "Do I want to know?" He asked calmly.

Jason laughed. "Magic tricks."

Bruce said nothing before going over to the kitchen counter and grabbing one of Tim's playing cards. He turned around and showed the boys the card before waving it up and down a few times.

"Bruce you can do magic?" Dick asked incredulously as the card seemingly dissapeared into thin air.

"Of course I can. It's easy." Bruce waved his hand again and the card reappeared.

Alfred cleared his throat from where he stood in the back. "Master Bruce, you are no more a magician than Tim or Dick." He stalked forward and took the card from Bruce, repeating the disappearing trick then turning his hand around to show that the card had not dissapeared but was merely tucked behind his fingers.

Jason snorted and collapsed back into the couch. "Is everyone in this family a fraud?"

"FATHER!" Damian shouted, running back into the room, chasing the white rabbit. The rabbit jumped into Bruce's arms before anyone could say or do anything.

Damian stopped dead in his tracks, looking at Bruce then at the rabbit. His eyes grew dark with realization and in the next instant he was on top of Tim, screaming about slow agonizing deaths and intestines.

"Time for our dissapearing act," Jason noted as they watched Tim and Damian grappling with one another on the floor. Dick, Bruce, Rabbit Bruce, Jason and Alfred quickly exited the room.

"Want to see my thumb disappear?" Bruce asked, once they were safely in the hallway.


End file.
